Life is sometimes hard but that doesn't mean it's not fair!

At the moment everything feels like a slog, I have two exams tomorrow, and the stress is mounting! Life seems hard at the moment, lots of pressure as we hurtle towards Christmas, I don't feel like I've had time to catch my breath, let alone blog!

In the words of the prophet Habakkuk (paraphrased), though life is unfair, though things don't seem to make sense, yet I will rejoice in my God.
Though things at the moment are hard (not due to any particular circumstance, just the cumulation of working life), I have found that God is still as worthy as he ever was.

At New Community Church at the moment, we are currently undergoing a move of buildings and a change in the new year to two meetings, whilst as a student work in the church we are moving from the chuch centre to the University Campus, as we want to be at the heart of student life, with the gospel in our hands, building relationships and making disciples.

Is it too much change? It seems that the slightest change, the smallest upheavel can frustrate people, if you don't understand the reasoning, if you don't see the purpose, then the change is a nuisance. Take for instance website changes, Facebook changes its layout and people get up in arms about it, but after a while they get used to it, I suppose it is because we are creatures of habit, but too much comfort is no good.

But don't misunderstand me, we are not moving for changes sake, we feel the purpose of God strongly as a student work to move to Campus, it is a strategic and prophetic move for advancement of the gospel, into one of the darkest places in our area. In the bible we see that the gospel is not hidden but shone out, we see that the Israelites were constantly on the move, even when they were settled in the promised land, their borders constantly changed, and in the new testament we see missionaries open up new areas with the gospel, planting churches and changing lives.

So at times life is hard but it is often better than being comfortable, the times I grow most are when I am stretched, the times I rely on God most are when I'm at the end of my abilities and look to God to see things happen, this is where I am at and pray will always be on my knees, praying for God to move.

Leaving so soon pt.3

Last Year in Loughborough....

At the end of my FP year I felt that I wouldn't be staying on in Loughborough beyond my degree. However I also felt that I was called to go back to Sidcup for the summer, that it wasn't just a return home for the holidays, but a time to pursue God in all things.

So, I went back and tried to get myself in to that mindset, however on the back of a hard FP year it was hard to motivate myself and build my relationship with God. Yet it got better, but in a way I didn't expect.

Every summer for as long as I have known, I have been to Christian conferences. For the last few years this would mean going to the Brighton Conference in July and Newday in August. However I felt God say to not go to either. Whilst Newday was on, my difficulties seemed even more acute, but on the Sunday, during the Matt Redman song 'You never let go' I felt a change.
I prayed out and God began an amazing work in me, to the extent that I sort to pursue God with all my heart. At the end of the summer I met up with Tim Blaber, student leader at New Community and he asked me if I would consider returning to Sidcup to lead the student work. This came as a big surprise to me, I had been praying to God about where I was to go post-degree, but I had excluded Sidcup as I'd had a prophecy when I was in Spain, that 'Sitting in a pew in a big church will kill you', basically just going to a big church without a role would be spiritual suicide, so i'd ruled Sidcup out. Yet when I prayed into it felt like I would go, but somehow I wasn't in a position to make that decision yet.

Returning to Loughborough was nice after having been away for 3 months and people were very encouraging, and I had a real sense of purpose to work hard in my final year and to honour God in the way that I work. However life soon became hard, I was still deliberating over the decision, and Sunday mornings had become no less hard than they had been in my FP year. I felt under real attack and one week it felt like the rug of faith had been pulled from underneath me, I questioned things that I had always taken as read, and life was hard. The crunch point came one week after church when there was community group meals afterwards and so everyone went to those, yet I didn't have a community group and wandered home, wondering why life was so hard and lonely.

Life can be hard and serving can be costly, but God dealt with me graciously, I decided to stop waiting for some kind of miraculous sign and accept the offer to take on the student work, and God gave me confirmation that I had made the right decision. Things got better and there have been ups and downs since, but these last 6 months have flown by so quickly that I have little I can remember to write. The main themes have been job interviews and working for exams. In between I have raised up a new setup team and handed over responsibility for it, and have run with all I can to pursue God.

So I have only one more Sunday left at the Well Church. I've given my all and pursued God over these last 4 years, and the pursuit has been not only well worth it but also reciprocal! I have given much over my time at the Well, but what I've given has been more than repaid, by the love and warmth of my family that is the church, the input of so many wonderfully gifted people and the opportunity to grow and flourish. It hasn't always been easy, but I am so thankful to so many people who have shaped me over this 4 years. I have changed so much over the 4 years (hopefully all for the better), from a elderly boy who was quite shy to a young man who shaves and more importantly is confident in who he is in Christ and who is privelidged to be a recipient of God's lavish grace and to be called a son.